Keyser?

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Keyser Soze
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Postby Keyser Soze » May 2nd, 2006 at 4:16 am

The virus (me) is back!

For those who give a fuck, I was in Chicago, left there about a month and and a half ago, I was supposed to come back in a week, but I was hospitalized after being shot in my leg, it took some time to recover, still not 100%, still recovering.
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I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.

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Deleted User
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Postby Deleted User » May 2nd, 2006 at 7:50 am

oh man, you guys were close with the "opened his mouth and then"... but it was shot, not jailed :D
I've been deleted!!

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Burzum
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Postby Burzum » May 2nd, 2006 at 10:22 am

monica wrote:hehe, i like keyser...


Let's go ahead and revoke her admin status...yeah...that would be gre-a-t.
Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.

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WidowMaker
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Postby WidowMaker » May 2nd, 2006 at 10:34 am

Glad you're OK Keyser. your e-thug life getting you in trouble, eh? :)


-Wid
- The AWP god formerly known as 'WidowMaker' [Retired]
-------------------------------------------------------------------
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-Retro Studios - www.retrostudios.com
-If the next Metroid sucks, you will know who to blame.

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Suck.
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Postby Suck. » May 2nd, 2006 at 11:32 am

Keyser Soze wrote:The virus (me) is back!

For those who give a fuck, I was in Chicago, left there about a month and and a half ago, I was supposed to come back in a week, but I was hospitalized after being shot in my leg, it took some time to recover, still not 100%, still recovering.

:shock:

I'm glad you're OK. Welcome back.


-Grant

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Burzum
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Postby Burzum » May 2nd, 2006 at 2:10 pm

I'd like to see a pic of your gun shot wound please. Take the pic while making a "peace" sign with your left hand.

Thanks! :D
Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.

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Catalyst22
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Postby Catalyst22 » May 2nd, 2006 at 2:11 pm

Listen you little Bitch. I told you if you ever told anyone I shot you in the leg I was going to shoot you in the other leg.

I'm Wayne Brady bitch!

South Coast Thugs aint got shizat on the West Coast.
“When you have the facts on your side, argue the facts. When you have the law on your side, argue the law. When neither is on your side, change the subject and question the motives of the opposition.â€

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Dylan
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Postby Dylan » May 2nd, 2006 at 3:48 pm

Ouch, where in Chicago did you get shot? And was it race related?
Servers gone and all of a sudden people have opinions of K2, weird

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sohpriest
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Postby sohpriest » May 2nd, 2006 at 4:53 pm

welcome back. Glad you're not dead
"I am Jack's smirking revenge."

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monica
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Postby monica » May 2nd, 2006 at 5:25 pm

Burzum wrote:
monica wrote:hehe, i like keyser...


Let's go ahead and revoke her admin status...yeah...that would be gre-a-t.


oh quit it!!!!!! :D



and glad ur okay, keyser!!
Image

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Keyser Soze
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Postby Keyser Soze » May 2nd, 2006 at 6:07 pm

Dylan wrote:Ouch, where in Chicago did you get shot? And was it race related?


I was near Cicero, I was actually in a car with 2 other friends, we were just driving back from a house party, we stopped on the way back and there was a shoot out, so they started shooting at our car 'cause we tryed to burn off, the driver didn't get hurt at all, but my friend who was in the back seat in on all types on medication now, he got shot in the liver, kidney and all that area.

I would post a pic for you Burzum, but I don't have a digital camera. Otherwise I would've done it without you asking.
Image

I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.

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Burzum
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Postby Burzum » May 3rd, 2006 at 8:52 am

I almost shot someone today on my way home. Okay no I didn't.

I was heading northbound on I-69 and I pulled into the right lane so someone could pass. I was going maybe 75. So I let the first car go by but I'm starting to run out of room...so I signal that I'm coming back in the left lane. Well the car behind the one I let pass didn't like it to much and starts to speed up. I still had enough room to get over but they had to slow down by 2mph. *oh noes!* After I complete my pass I get back over so they can get around.

I guess that pissed off the hillbillies in the back seat. I call them hillbillies because these guys looked like they were right out of deliverance. One of the guys was growling at me. I say growling because he was barring his teeth and his lips were flapping. I say they were hillbillies because normal people aren't this ugly. He's got a hack-job shaved head and was missing at least two teeth and couldn't have been a day over 21. His brother/lover/dad is sitting next to him and was maybe 22, and looked almost exactly the same. And they were pointing at me with their middle fingers and shouting something. I think they were yelling at me to squeel like a pig. Both of them probably had chubs just looking at my big 'ol tires.

So the car goes by and I'm just kinda staring at them like I do at the Pandas in the zoo. That is if the pandas were rabbid, inbred, baby-eating homos. So I finally regain my presence of mind and decide to tap on the glass a little to see if they know any tricks. I speed up and pass them, well they don't even notice as I go by the first time. I see what appears to be a very normal looking girl driving (except she's 13 if she's a day over 5) and sitting next to her is this older man in his 30's. I'm guessing that's Grandpa. I also notice that the two hillbillies in the back can't weigh more than 90lbs both togeather soaking wet. My confidence is renewed. First a 13yo girl isn't going to do any stupid driving. Second, Keyser could beat these two guys up with a USB cable and a paper plate.

So I slow down a bit so I can see the freaks again. They both have their faces pressed against the glass bearing toothless snarls and stabbing middle fingers. So I blow them a kiss and wave. It was like spraying a pitbull with a garden hose! They both freak out. I swear one of them was swinging from the dome light. I laugh. More spitting, snarling and bird flipping. I laugh harder. I cannot describe how absolutily hillareous these two look. I named one Bubba and the other Cooter.

Bubba and Cooter started stabbing with their fingers for me to take the next exit. It just so happened to be my exit anyway! So I give them the "bring it on wave". More dome light swinging. I signal to turn and wave for them to pull in front of me so they can take the exit too. I guess it wasn't their exit because they just kept driving. I waved dissappointedly at their spit covered rear window as they crested the hill and begin to decend. They waved good by to me too using the Hardfought salute. If I'm ever in Alabama I hope to see them again. I love the zoo!!
Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.

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Suck.
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Postby Suck. » May 3rd, 2006 at 1:12 pm

Image


-G.

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Catalyst22
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Postby Catalyst22 » May 3rd, 2006 at 1:29 pm

Burzum wrote:I almost shot someone today on my way home. Okay no I didn't.

I was heading northbound on I-69 and I pulled into the right lane so someone could pass. I was going maybe 75. So I let the first car go by but I'm starting to run out of room...so I signal that I'm coming back in the left lane. Well the car behind the one I let pass didn't like it to much and starts to speed up. I still had enough room to get over but they had to slow down by 2mph. *oh noes!* After I complete my pass I get back over so they can get around.

I guess that pissed off the hillbillies in the back seat. I call them hillbillies because these guys looked like they were right out of deliverance. One of the guys was growling at me. I say growling because he was barring his teeth and his lips were flapping. I say they were hillbillies because normal people aren't this ugly. He's got a hack-job shaved head and was missing at least two teeth and couldn't have been a day over 21. His brother/lover/dad is sitting next to him and was maybe 22, and looked almost exactly the same. And they were pointing at me with their middle fingers and shouting something. I think they were yelling at me to squeel like a pig. Both of them probably had chubs just looking at my big 'ol tires.

So the car goes by and I'm just kinda staring at them like I do at the Pandas in the zoo. That is if the pandas were rabbid, inbred, baby-eating homos. So I finally regain my presence of mind and decide to tap on the glass a little to see if they know any tricks. I speed up and pass them, well they don't even notice as I go by the first time. I see what appears to be a very normal looking girl driving (except she's 13 if she's a day over 5) and sitting next to her is this older man in his 30's. I'm guessing that's Grandpa. I also notice that the two hillbillies in the back can't weigh more than 90lbs both togeather soaking wet. My confidence is renewed. First a 13yo girl isn't going to do any stupid driving. Second, Keyser could beat these two guys up with a USB cable and a paper plate.

So I slow down a bit so I can see the freaks again. They both have their faces pressed against the glass bearing toothless snarls and stabbing middle fingers. So I blow them a kiss and wave. It was like spraying a pitbull with a garden hose! They both freak out. I swear one of them was swinging from the dome light. I laugh. More spitting, snarling and bird flipping. I laugh harder. I cannot describe how absolutily hillareous these two look. I named one Bubba and the other Cooter.

Bubba and Cooter started stabbing with their fingers for me to take the next exit. It just so happened to be my exit anyway! So I give them the "bring it on wave". More dome light swinging. I signal to turn and wave for them to pull in front of me so they can take the exit too. I guess it wasn't their exit because they just kept driving. I waved dissappointedly at their spit covered rear window as they crested the hill and begin to decend. They waved good by to me too using the Hardfought salute. If I'm ever in Alabama I hope to see them again. I love the zoo!!


I (Cooter) was heading northbound on I-69 with my rockabilly bandmate (Bubba) when this city living asshole cut me off. I was bent over pulling out another Pabst Blue Ribbon when this guy just darted in front of me out of nowhere in this little Ford Ranger truck. I spilled my beer on the Drummers daughters head (she was playing with a wad of chewing tobacco in the floor board). So we flipped him off and called him names like "city boy" and "shit bird" and "dick weed" and "turd roper". I'd have rammed the truck with my front brush guard, but I was in awe of those big fat wheels.

So we put the baby behind the wheel and hopped in the back seat so we could swing from the dome light and show our male dominance. Then this homosexual blows us a kiss and we imediately became arroused. Bubba gave him the universal signal for "stop at the next truck stop so we can pound ass hoops" and the guy actually turned! Looloo Bee didn't have the where with all to turn with him so we ended up just drinking ourselves into shitsville.

[the end]
“When you have the facts on your side, argue the facts. When you have the law on your side, argue the law. When neither is on your side, change the subject and question the motives of the opposition.â€

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WidowMaker
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Postby WidowMaker » May 3rd, 2006 at 1:32 pm

Suck should spell check his pictures.


-Wid
- The AWP god formerly known as 'WidowMaker' [Retired]

-------------------------------------------------------------------

-Game Designer

-Retro Studios - www.retrostudios.com

-If the next Metroid sucks, you will know who to blame.

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Catalyst22
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Postby Catalyst22 » May 3rd, 2006 at 1:35 pm

Sock cant spell farshit
“When you have the facts on your side, argue the facts. When you have the law on your side, argue the law. When neither is on your side, change the subject and question the motives of the opposition.â€

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Burzum
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Postby Burzum » May 3rd, 2006 at 1:36 pm

Catalyst22 wrote:
Burzum wrote:I almost shot someone today on my way home. Okay no I didn't.

I was heading northbound on I-69 and I pulled into the right lane so someone could pass. I was going maybe 75. So I let the first car go by but I'm starting to run out of room...so I signal that I'm coming back in the left lane. Well the car behind the one I let pass didn't like it to much and starts to speed up. I still had enough room to get over but they had to slow down by 2mph. *oh noes!* After I complete my pass I get back over so they can get around.

I guess that pissed off the hillbillies in the back seat. I call them hillbillies because these guys looked like they were right out of deliverance. One of the guys was growling at me. I say growling because he was barring his teeth and his lips were flapping. I say they were hillbillies because normal people aren't this ugly. He's got a hack-job shaved head and was missing at least two teeth and couldn't have been a day over 21. His brother/lover/dad is sitting next to him and was maybe 22, and looked almost exactly the same. And they were pointing at me with their middle fingers and shouting something. I think they were yelling at me to squeel like a pig. Both of them probably had chubs just looking at my big 'ol tires.

So the car goes by and I'm just kinda staring at them like I do at the Pandas in the zoo. That is if the pandas were rabbid, inbred, baby-eating homos. So I finally regain my presence of mind and decide to tap on the glass a little to see if they know any tricks. I speed up and pass them, well they don't even notice as I go by the first time. I see what appears to be a very normal looking girl driving (except she's 13 if she's a day over 5) and sitting next to her is this older man in his 30's. I'm guessing that's Grandpa. I also notice that the two hillbillies in the back can't weigh more than 90lbs both togeather soaking wet. My confidence is renewed. First a 13yo girl isn't going to do any stupid driving. Second, Keyser could beat these two guys up with a USB cable and a paper plate.

So I slow down a bit so I can see the freaks again. They both have their faces pressed against the glass bearing toothless snarls and stabbing middle fingers. So I blow them a kiss and wave. It was like spraying a pitbull with a garden hose! They both freak out. I swear one of them was swinging from the dome light. I laugh. More spitting, snarling and bird flipping. I laugh harder. I cannot describe how absolutily hillareous these two look. I named one Bubba and the other Cooter.

Bubba and Cooter started stabbing with their fingers for me to take the next exit. It just so happened to be my exit anyway! So I give them the "bring it on wave". More dome light swinging. I signal to turn and wave for them to pull in front of me so they can take the exit too. I guess it wasn't their exit because they just kept driving. I waved dissappointedly at their spit covered rear window as they crested the hill and begin to decend. They waved good by to me too using the Hardfought salute. If I'm ever in Alabama I hope to see them again. I love the zoo!!


I (Cooter) was heading northbound on I-69 with my rockabilly bandmate (Bubba) when this city living asshole cut me off. I was bent over pulling out another Pabst Blue Ribbon when this guy just darted in front of me out of nowhere in this little Ford Ranger truck. I spilled my beer on the Drummers daughters head (she was playing with a wad of chewing tobacco in the floor board). So we flipped him off and called him names like "city boy" and "shit bird" and "dick weed" and "turd roper". I'd have rammed the truck with my front brush guard, but I was in awe of those big fat wheels.

So we put the baby behind the wheel and hopped in the back seat so we could swing from the dome light and show our male dominance. Then this homosexual blows us a kiss and we imediately became arroused. Bubba gave him the universal signal for "stop at the next truck stop so we can pound ass hoops" and the guy actually turned! Looloo Bee didn't have the where with all to turn with him so we ended up just drinking ourselves into shitsville.

[the end]


OMG that is the funniest thing I've read all year.
Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.

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Postby Deleted User » May 3rd, 2006 at 4:32 pm

good story :D
I've been deleted!!

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I Want Some Taquitos
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Postby I Want Some Taquitos » May 8th, 2006 at 4:58 pm

Keyser Soze wrote:
Dylan wrote:Ouch, where in Chicago did you get shot? And was it race related?


I was near Cicero, I was actually in a car with 2 other friends, we were just driving back from a house party, we stopped on the way back and there was a shoot out, so they started shooting at our car 'cause we tryed to burn off, the driver didn't get hurt at all, but my friend who was in the back seat in on all types on medication now, he got shot in the liver, kidney and all that area.

I would post a pic for you Burzum, but I don't have a digital camera. Otherwise I would've done it without you asking.


Cicero, huh? I'd only drive through Cicero if it was noon and I was in a fucking tank. People have been shot there for actually doing nothing...it's pretty crazy...oh yeah, i'm kinda back too... :D
Image

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Catalyst22
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Postby Catalyst22 » May 8th, 2006 at 6:06 pm

I was in Cicero shooting Cans that night. I'm suprised that I missed you ;)
“When you have the facts on your side, argue the facts. When you have the law on your side, argue the law. When neither is on your side, change the subject and question the motives of the opposition.â€

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b0ba
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Postby b0ba » May 8th, 2006 at 7:01 pm

way to go guys....you have pulled him back from the depths of hell.

[18:59] <Jigsaw-Laptop> What's up man?!

good job guys...gee effing gee

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Keyser Soze
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Postby Keyser Soze » May 8th, 2006 at 7:18 pm

b0ba wrote:way to go guys....you have pulled him back from the depths of hell.

[18:59] <Jigsaw-Laptop> What's up man?!

good job guys...gee effing gee


You know you love it, baby.
Image

I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.

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Postby Deleted User » May 8th, 2006 at 7:42 pm

Suck. wrote:Image


-G.


hahahahahahahaha... oh man
I've been deleted!!

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Best_predator
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Postby Best_predator » May 8th, 2006 at 7:54 pm

Such a rip off... heres the original...

Image
Sneaky bastard...
"Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Willing is not enough; we must do." ~ Goethe

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Postby Deleted User » May 8th, 2006 at 7:55 pm

Best_predator wrote:Such a rip off... heres the original...

Image


EVEN BETTER :lol:
I've been deleted!!


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