Beer VS Pussy

Anything and everything goes here... post away!

Moderators: EatMoreLead, Nad, Suck.

User avatar
Keyser Soze
The Devil
Posts: 1403
Joined: Jan 9th, 2005 at 12:37 am

Beer VS Pussy

Postby Keyser Soze » Nov 4th, 2005 at 3:28 pm

It is time to do a comparison between two things treasured by men, beer and pussy...

A beer is always wet.
A pussy needs encouragement.
Advantage: Beer.

A beer tastes horrible served hot.
A pussy tastes better served hot.
Advantage: Pussy.

Having an ice cold beer makes you satisfied.
Having an ice cold pussy makes you Hillary Clinton.
Advantage: Beer.

Beers have commercials making fun of skunky ones.
Pussy does not.
advantage: Tie

If you get a hair in your teeth
consuming pussy, you are not disgusted.
Advantage: Pussy

24 beers come in a box.
A pussy is a box you can come in.
Advantage: Pussy

Too much head makes you mad at the
person giving you a beer.
Advantage: Pussy.

If a beer is brewed with yeast, it is
still edible.
Advantage: Beer.

If you come home smelling like beer,
your wife may get mad. If you come home
smelling like pussy, she will definitely get mad.
Advantage: Beer.

6 beers in a night and you better not
drive. 6 pussies in a night and you
have done all the driving you need.
Advantage: Pussy

Buy too much beer and you will get fat.
Buy too much pussy and you will get poor.
Advantage: Tie

It is socially acceptable to have a beer in the stands at a football game.
You are a legend if you have a pussy in the stands at a football game.
Advantage: Pussy

If a cop smells beer on your breath,
you are going to get a breathalyzer.
If a cop smells pussy on your breath,
you are going to get a high five.
Advantage: Pussy

With beer, bigger is better.
Advantage: beer.

Wearing a condom does not make a beer
any less enjoyable.
Advantage: beer.

Pussy can make you see God. Beer can
make you see the porcelain god.
Advantage: Pussy

If you think all day about the next pussy
you will have, you are normal.
If you think all day about your next beer,
you are an alcoholic.
Advantage: Pussy

Peeling labels off of beers is fun.
Peeling panties off of pussy is more fun.
Advantage: Pussy.

If you try to snag a beer at work,
you get fired. If you try to snag a pussy
at work, you get hit with sexual harassment.
Advantage: Tie

If you suddenly drop a beer, it may
break. If you suddenly drop a pussy,
it may hunt you down like the dog you are.
Advantage: Beer.

If you change to another beer, your
old brand will gladly have you back.
Advantage: Beer.

The best pussy you have ever had is
not gone once you have enjoyed it.
Advantage: Pussy.

The worst pussy you have ever had is
not gone once you have enjoyed it.
Advantage: Beer.

Bad beer: Schlitz, PBR, Old Swill.
Bad pussy: Roseanne, Janet Reno, Madeline Albright.
Advantage: Tie

Good beer: Samuel Adams, Moosehead,
Pete's Wicked Winter Brew.
Good pussy: Almost all but the above.
Advantage Pussy.

The government taxes beer.
Advantage: Pussy.
Image
I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.

User avatar
LeoPawnz
seiko pawn
Posts: 680
Joined: Feb 7th, 2005 at 10:03 pm

Postby LeoPawnz » Nov 4th, 2005 at 5:30 pm

Derfel wrote:Like you've had either of the above.


We need a separate poll for those who saw that from a mile away and those who still dont know wtf is going on.
not your average pawn...
Image

WoW - Sour - 60 Undead Warrior - Hellscream (rest in peace)
BFBC2 - AndoRando (level 50 F2000 specialist)
OH HECKYNAW!!!

User avatar
Shade
Elite Member
Posts: 1342
Joined: Dec 1st, 2004 at 12:03 pm

Postby Shade » Nov 4th, 2005 at 6:00 pm

Leave Keyser alone, we were all virgins at one time.

Keyser best advice i can give you about Beer and Pussy, Beer can you help you get pussy. Beer can make some Pussy Bearable.
ClanKiller | Shade

User avatar
b0ba
Senior Member
Posts: 363
Joined: Sep 15th, 2002 at 10:17 am

Postby b0ba » Nov 4th, 2005 at 6:55 pm

finally a worthwhile post from keyser...too bad he just reprinted what someone else said. Still waiting for your first intelligent thought buddy!

User avatar
Keyser Soze
The Devil
Posts: 1403
Joined: Jan 9th, 2005 at 12:37 am

Postby Keyser Soze » Nov 4th, 2005 at 7:29 pm

b0ba wrote:finally a worthwhile post from keyser...too bad he just reprinted what someone else said. Still waiting for your first intelligent thought buddy!


Yeah, you would wait for my posts, wouldn't you, seems like you've got nothing better to do.
Image

I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.

User avatar
JayPhat
Elite Member
Posts: 2701
Joined: Feb 24th, 2005 at 7:35 pm

Postby JayPhat » Nov 4th, 2005 at 7:45 pm

I thought this was relevant to this topic.
Image
Image

User avatar
CyberPitz
Elite Member
Posts: 1538
Joined: Oct 11th, 2004 at 2:53 pm

Postby CyberPitz » Nov 4th, 2005 at 7:49 pm

fap fap fap

User avatar
Keyser Soze
The Devil
Posts: 1403
Joined: Jan 9th, 2005 at 12:37 am

Postby Keyser Soze » Nov 4th, 2005 at 7:53 pm

CyberPitz wrote:fap fap fap


:lol:
Image

I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.

User avatar
monica
Senior Member
Posts: 351
Joined: Aug 16th, 2005 at 10:33 pm

Postby monica » Nov 4th, 2005 at 8:32 pm

JayPhat wrote:I thought this was relevant to this topic.
Image


forget that i read this, jay?
Image

User avatar
LeoPawnz
seiko pawn
Posts: 680
Joined: Feb 7th, 2005 at 10:03 pm

Postby LeoPawnz » Nov 4th, 2005 at 8:58 pm

doghouse!
not your average pawn...
Image

WoW - Sour - 60 Undead Warrior - Hellscream (rest in peace)
BFBC2 - AndoRando (level 50 F2000 specialist)
OH HECKYNAW!!!

User avatar
JayPhat
Elite Member
Posts: 2701
Joined: Feb 24th, 2005 at 7:35 pm

Postby JayPhat » Nov 4th, 2005 at 9:02 pm

LeoPawnz wrote:doghouse!


You think!!! Our landlord won't let us have pets so we don't own one for me to be stuck in!
Image

User avatar
monica
Senior Member
Posts: 351
Joined: Aug 16th, 2005 at 10:33 pm

Postby monica » Nov 4th, 2005 at 9:49 pm

JayPhat wrote:
LeoPawnz wrote:doghouse!


You think!!! Our landlord won't let us have pets so we don't own one for me to be stuck in!


trust me, honey....that won't stop it from happening. :P
Image

User avatar
Mouser
Elite Member
Posts: 1633
Joined: Dec 12th, 2004 at 8:34 pm

Postby Mouser » Nov 4th, 2005 at 10:48 pm

JayPhat wrote:You think!!! Our landlord won't let us have pets so we don't own one for me to be stuck in!


You'd be stuck in your pet. You need to stay far far away from the interweb. :roll:

User avatar
CyberPitz
Elite Member
Posts: 1538
Joined: Oct 11th, 2004 at 2:53 pm

Postby CyberPitz » Nov 4th, 2005 at 11:48 pm

monica wrote:
JayPhat wrote:
LeoPawnz wrote:doghouse!


You think!!! Our landlord won't let us have pets so we don't own one for me to be stuck in!


trust me, honey....that won't stop it from happening. :P


........
.........
pwnd.

Image

Something else!

User avatar
JayPhat
Elite Member
Posts: 2701
Joined: Feb 24th, 2005 at 7:35 pm

Postby JayPhat » Nov 5th, 2005 at 12:01 am

Wheres the beer in that one. At least photoshop one in.
Image

User avatar
Keyser Soze
The Devil
Posts: 1403
Joined: Jan 9th, 2005 at 12:37 am

Postby Keyser Soze » Nov 5th, 2005 at 12:08 am

Damn, you know as soon as Jay posted that, I was like, "When monica sees that, he's screwed."
Image

I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.

User avatar
monica
Senior Member
Posts: 351
Joined: Aug 16th, 2005 at 10:33 pm

Postby monica » Nov 5th, 2005 at 12:12 am

ok fine! keep postin' nekked girls...then here's sumthin' for me (and shade!!)

Image

mmm mmm MMM! hoobastank singer doug robb.... *drool* :P
Image

User avatar
Catalyst22
Elite Member
Posts: 3606
Joined: Sep 30th, 2004 at 8:21 pm

Postby Catalyst22 » Nov 5th, 2005 at 12:27 am

Is Monica the one on top or bottom? Either way... she is hawt! :P
“When you have the facts on your side, argue the facts. When you have the law on your side, argue the law. When neither is on your side, change the subject and question the motives of the opposition.â€

User avatar
DoCFuRy[12PC]
Elite Member
Posts: 1021
Joined: Nov 11th, 2004 at 1:04 am

Postby DoCFuRy[12PC] » Nov 5th, 2005 at 12:40 am

Im wondering if Keyser may be gay based on the topic title. There is NEVER a VS. when it comes to beer and pussy. Its how can you have both................. although, there are no advantages to either. They really are both bad for you, cause you are only going to get a kid, an STD, or heartache from pussy, and you will only end up broke, an alcoholic or at the very least a bad hangover from beer. In reality the world would be much better without either but then again what fucking fun would that be....pun intended.


Image

User avatar
monica
Senior Member
Posts: 351
Joined: Aug 16th, 2005 at 10:33 pm

Postby monica » Nov 5th, 2005 at 1:19 am

Catalyst22 wrote:Is Monica the one on top or bottom? Either way... she is hawt! :P


hmmm....i choose top, she seems pretty hawt, sexy, agressive... :P
Image

User avatar
Mouser
Elite Member
Posts: 1633
Joined: Dec 12th, 2004 at 8:34 pm

Postby Mouser » Nov 5th, 2005 at 2:06 am

You made me spit run and coke through my nose.

User avatar
Deleted User
*poof*
Posts: 7507
Joined: Jul 13th, 2006 at 3:41 am

Postby Deleted User » Nov 5th, 2005 at 6:10 am

monica sounds like the type of girl who'd go to a titty bar. :wink:
I've been deleted!!

User avatar
sohpriest
Senior Member
Posts: 718
Joined: Oct 15th, 2005 at 8:26 pm

Postby sohpriest » Nov 5th, 2005 at 8:57 am

jay is a lucking man. time to spring the 3 way on her.
"I am Jack's smirking revenge."

User avatar
monica
Senior Member
Posts: 351
Joined: Aug 16th, 2005 at 10:33 pm

Postby monica » Nov 5th, 2005 at 10:54 am

Mouser wrote:You made me spit run and coke through my nose.


haha, i try....but mouser, please don't blame me for your drug addictions :wink: i didn't MAKE you do anything

Benedict wrote:monica sounds like the type of girl who'd go to a titty bar. :wink:


:) girls are hawt...

Derfel wrote:Monica sounds like that type of girl who'd OWN a titty bar...


hahaha, might be a wise investment. there will never come a day when a guy won't wanna go to a bar filled with half-naked women. it would bring me in a steady income for my whole life....so long as i changed out the girls every once in awhile, i suppose. don't want any grannies up there...

sohpriest wrote:jay is a lucking man. time to spring the 3 way on her.


date. time. location.
Image

User avatar
Keyser Soze
The Devil
Posts: 1403
Joined: Jan 9th, 2005 at 12:37 am

Postby Keyser Soze » Nov 5th, 2005 at 11:01 am

monica wrote:
Mouser wrote:You made me spit run and coke through my nose.


haha, i try....but mouser, please don't blame me for your drug addictions :wink: i didn't MAKE you do anything

Benedict wrote:monica sounds like the type of girl who'd go to a titty bar. :wink:


:) girls are hawt...

Derfel wrote:Monica sounds like that type of girl who'd OWN a titty bar...


hahaha, might be a wise investment. there will never come a day when a guy won't wanna go to a bar filled with half-naked women. it would bring me in a steady income for my whole life....so long as i changed out the girls every once in awhile, i suppose. don't want any grannies up there...

sohpriest wrote:jay is a lucking man. time to spring the 3 way on her.


date. time. location.


;o, no action for poor old Keyser... :oops:
Image

I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.


Return to “General Discussion”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 8 guests